Worse than ''ugly american''

The Duomo, a glory without tourists.

A reproduction of a Da Vinci machine at a very small museum of repros. (My first, and probably last, museum in Firenze.)




Lunch... foccacia with roasted tomatoes, peppers, and artichokes.


Leather Market... view from my classroom.

So, this morning I got up at 6 in the morning. No reason. Just couldn't sleep. I decided to take advantage of the situation and go to see the gorgeous Duomo at a time where there were no tourists. It was beautiful in the morning light. And completely empty. Kinda like the East village in the morning... you can hardly believe that it could ever be peaceful.

Classes start at 9 in the morning, so after a much needed cappucchino, I headed off to change the level of my class. In the beginner class, we spent three days learning how to say "what's your name'' and ''where are you from.'' Basta. No one spoke any Italian at all.

So I changed my class. It was fine... I was on page 13 in the other class and in this class I'm on page 101. So, I taught myself how to conjugate verbs in the present tense last night, and today we learned the simple future. No problem.

Then things took an ugly turn for the worse. Across from me was sitting a 15 year old Austrian boy who seems to have ADD and had forgotten to take his meds. He spent the whole time drawing fancy script of the band AC/DC (are they even still alive?!?) and making sure the teacher saw it. He kept rocking in his chair, making jokes, not paying attention and responding in English when asked a question. I really wanted to slap him. In the last hour of class, which is supposed to be conversation practice (which everyone seems to hate but I love), he would talk loudly to his friend when someone else was speaking. The teacher really didn't do anything to stop it. So there's this old Brazilian man trying his best to talk, and this kid is yapping with some austrian girl, so I yell at them, in English "WILL YOU SHUT THE HELL UP?" and they did.

Then there's the australian boy, living in Barcellona, 16 years old, who could not be more holier-than-thou if he tried. At some point in the lesson, the teacher gives some instructions, and leaves the room for a few minutes. No one seemed to understand what we were supposed to do. I didn't either, which was pretty much the first time since I arrived. So this kid, [insert lofty English here] says ''**SIGH** You don't UNDERstand? **SIGH**. What we're SUPPOSed to do is ask a question, and the other person is TO ANSwer it. And then we're SUPPOSed to guess what the person is. NOW do you get it [rolls eyes] ? ''

There are very few times in my life I am at a loss for words. In English or any other language for that matter. I was flabbergasted. It was the single most obnoxious, condescending, insulting comment I've ever heard from another person in my life.

Of course, he was wrong.

There comes a time in one's life where you recognize that you have become an adult, the one you made fun of as a kid. I was that person today. I am that senior citizen in the back of a college classroom, trying to better myself, where everyone else is on mommy and daddy's dime (in this case, euro) just waiting for class to be over. I always hated those old people, showing off, truly interested and better than I was. Now I am that person.

On the other hand, I may just beat the shit out of those boys tomorrow.